130 days after

I just got my first rejection letter for a job this morning.

I thought I would be more upset, but I’m really not. Well maybe I am, but I’m doing a good job of not allowing myself to feel that way.

It might be because I didn’t want the job to begin with. I was never excited about it enough to want it that bad. Also, because it’s a job in marketing and I kind of hate marketing even though I spent 4 years studying it.

So I guess I’m really not that upset about not getting it. Perhaps I was more excited about what came with having a full time job than the actual job itself. I romanticized this whole life beyond college that I failed to focus on the details. I just imagined myself making all this extra money and being able to quit my current job (which I dislike so much).

I pictured myself dressing a different way and getting coffee in the morning and going into work and being greeted by all my new coworkers that were all smart and educated. I imagined having new friends and maybe even a love interest and going out on weekends and having dates with men more my type.

In the end, I guess I just have to accept that this wasn’t the plan for me at this stage of my life and so I will move on. I will go back to searching and waiting and hoping that the right opportunity presents itself to me.




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